Choosing my own standards
Music is a passion I've always had, but I slowly let go of it because I kept on comparing myself to others and I couldn't find the point of continuing when I felt that everyone was better than me.
I've always had this pattern with my passions: I'd start because of some spark, get really into it, but then lose myself chasing benchmarks to measure myself against others. I always found them useful because it's easier to measure yourself against someone else's path than to try and build your own road and compass from scratch. But every shortcut has a price.
Relying on metrics that had nothing to do with my own journey and values led me to undervalue myself and doubt who I am, because inevitably I wasn't hitting other people's standards.
Eventually I realized that those standards were not meant for me. They weren't mine, and they weren't helping me get what I actually wanted.
They were convenient, low-effort to follow, and already validated by someone else. But they would never support my growth in the direction I wanted to chase.
I still struggle to remind myself that I'm the only one who can set standards that are truly meaningful for me. I guess it's a journey and I'm getting there.
That's definitely one metric I find useful: "What kind of tomorrow am I building with today's choices?"